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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I was wondering if any of you guys have any input on how to balance my young career and a newborn. I want to help my wife as much as possible, and still maintain my ability, attention, and energy level at work.
I’d love to have some input from guys who’ve done it and just looking for what to do and what not to do. Both professionally and at home. We work 6:30 til 2:30 and I go back Monday.
Mainly: what were some things you did to help you balance home and work?
 

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Congratulations! Get ready! Lol! We were lucky and CDCAppentace slept through the night after about 2 months.

Only let him/her sleep in their own bed in their room! This will help in the future, separation anxiety, same with the sucker, or pacifier. We caved on the latter just to get him to stfu! Take turns feeding/diapers at night. Don’t freak out if you’re wife calls in the middle of the day to say she was trimming finger nails and cut off a tip of a finger and it won’t stop bleeding! It’ll happen! Just paper towel and pressure.

When you put your kid to bed, we started at 6pm, spend at least an hour with your wife if/when you can! Believe me, that’s the biggest piece of advice I can give you! A kid can be a wedge in the relationship! But… at the same time you’re going to have broken sleep for months.

Never thought I’d be giving parenting advice. One other piece of advice for 5 years from now, try to get yourselves in a position to homeschool. We have a saying in the military “good enough for government work. Same thing with government schools.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
My dad did a fair bit of work on government projects as a PM when I was a kid and he passed on the phrase “good enough for government work” to me and my brothers as well.
We’re in a two bedroom house for now and we have a 7 year old girl. (This is my first) We didn’t want to take her space so his crib is in our room for now.
I will certainly try to heed the advice on spending time with the misses, we’ll be kicking long after the kids are gone I hope.
 

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My dad did a fair bit of work on government projects as a PM when I was a kid and he passed on the phrase “good enough for government work” to me and my brothers as well.
We’re in a two bedroom house for now and we have a 7 year old girl. (This is my first) We didn’t want to take her space so his crib is in our room for now.
I will certainly try to heed the advice on spending time with the misses, we’ll be kicking long after the kids are gone I hope.
Not going to be fun, but if the baby is the same as you, let it cry for at least three minutes. They won’t learn that what they need is seconds away.
 

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philosopher and statesmen
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The best advice I can give you is to just get up every night and do the night duty with
your new child.... I did this with both of ours and let my wife get the sleep she needed....

If you keep the wife from getting crabby then you are winning the long game here...(y).
just get up when the kid cries and feed them or change the diapers..... sit up in a rocking
chair with them .... do whatever it takes to maintain the peace.... We bought one of those
battery operated rockers and my kids rocked all the way to the moon and back with me sitting
with them.......

You will get used to this pretty quickly and strong coffe is always wise to get moving in the morning...

Also you are building up lots brownie points that can be cashed in down the road .... someday maybe in 6 months from now
you are gonna want to go play cards or go out with the boys or get some time to yourself and if she squawks about
this, ------ then she can start to get her ass out of bed every night with the kid...

just do the night duty and you can do no wrong......
 

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4th year apprentice
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If your employer is not understanding of family issues which may affect your schedule, sometimes at short notice, find one who is. There are still those out there who recognize the sanctity of the family. Be sure not to abuse it of course, but ideally you want one who comes out and tells you before you even have to ask, that if there is ever any issue with your family, just say the word and he'll do what he can to accomodate you. I've had a few of those, and the relief they gave was incredible.
 

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I’m not sure where you are. But when my older two were born, I went back to work. I felt a ton of pressure to keep the $$ coming in.

When my third was born, I took some of the FMLA benefits. At that time, it was up to six weeks in the first year of the kid’s life. It was at that time like 80% of your last12 months of salary.

I can not recommend this enough. Take the time to be with your wife and new baby. Support them emotionally and physically as much as you can. Think about what your wife went through and be as empathetic as possible. When the baby is up in the middle of the night, bring the baby to her to get fed, change the baby and then you go back to sleep. I would’ve fed the baby if I could. But I don’t have that equipment. I assume you don’t either. When we went to formula, I fed him frequently.

Congratulations!
 

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Reverend, R.S.E., Master Plumber
Nice Head, what’s in the bag?
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Fack
Good luck, I raised my daughter by myself since she was 5 and slowly built my business.
it wasn’t easy- many sleepless nights, days eating ketchup sandwiches and not seeing a dentist for 15 years just so I could provide for her..

jump ahead to now, she is 23, and has moved out, and my business is booming.

stick with it- work hard, save and provide for you family, always support your wife and do what ever she asks/needs you to do.
That will go a long way, be the best dad you can be, spend as much time as you can with your little one, as they grow- cuz before you know it they’ll be 20… and you’ll be 20 years older.
 

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Before you take off the old diaper put some wipes down. Often when you lift their legs to wipe it squeezes out poop like a playdoh extruder. Also, always wear a shirt and deodorant for diaper changes, pull it over your nose.

Babies cry, it's what they do, try to get used to it quickly.

Having children is all joy and no fun.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
Also, if it’s a boy, when you change a diaper, cover his junk. There something about a cold air or the diaper coming off that will cause him to pee. Possibly in your face. Guaranteed to be at least on your clothes.
Learned this lesson the hard way. Gotta be quick throwing that new diaper over his Johnson I learned.
 

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philosopher and statesmen
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“If you have a boy, you have only one penis to worry about, if you have a girl you have all the penises to worry about!”
Lots of peckers out there looking for trouble if you have a girl
 

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My advice: Stop with him....don't have {5} like I did. Although I of course love all of my children, things would have been easier with out having so many babies. My youngest is 10 about to turn 11 and she is the apple of my eye. I love that little girl than I love myself.

And I also was a hands-on dad. I changed more nigttime diapers than my wife due to the fact that she was and still is a night worker. She loves night shift. {she's an RN}.

So get ready for the little vomit episodes at 3 AM and you have to bathe the baby while she or he is sleeping though it all!...LOL. Then throw the sheets into the tub, rinse the vomit, then throw them into the washing machine and all that you want to do is go back to sleep....LOL
 
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